Moms of Modesty

God seeking and modest women who answer the call to be homemakers.

Maidservants Wanted

Where is a maidservant when you need one?

 
Proverbs 31:15
She also rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household, and a portion for her maidservants.”
 
You know what this verse tells me? It tells me that even back then, mothers had outside help around the house. In fact, Holy books like the Bible and Qur’an speak of having slaves and servants all throughout but before I go any further, let me just clarify that slaves and servants were not like what we think and know of today. Slaves and servants in those days were what we would consider today to be “Molly Maids”  or something equal to that. This was a reasonable occupation to have if one chose to be that. They had rights and they were paid. It’s only the ugliness of the slave trade  in America, Europe, and in some Arab countries that made slavery so deplorable and a thing to look down upon and gave the word “slavery”  its new meaning.
 
Let me get back to my point. Why are we as moms acting like we can be all, do it all, and have it all, ALL AT THE SAME TIME. I must admit that before I had my last child, I didn’t think too highly of hired or even free help (from family or friends). I took pride in the fact that I was able to run my household, work full-time, and still have a  little bit of energy at the end of the day for some me time. Lately, this has not been the case and in the wake of my reality check, I have had a change of heart about how I view mothers who hire a nanny or a maid to help them keep their sanity. Mothers are not perfect, we are not Super Women with the ability to juggle all these different balls everyday, all day.
Everyday I start with a long list of To Do’s and many times, the clothes are left in the dryer all week, I miss a deadline at school for one of my kids activities, I never make it out of my pajamas until the end of the day onlywhen it’s time to go to bed again, or I’ve burned dinner because I’m monitoring the kid’s homework at the same time. Don’t get me wrong, I love my life no matter how crazy it is during the day. I just think that there is nothing wrong with having a little help around the house as needed to maintain a functional home. I don’t want to give the green light to mothers who want to take advantage and rely 100% on others to do what they are ultimately responsible for doing themselves.
 
Many cultures around the world see the importance of having someone in the home to aid with taking care of chores in the house in order to give the mother time to dedicate her time to the children and husband. In my husband’s culture, when a woman has small children, the women in the family will rally their support by cooking, cleaning, and running errands for at least the first 3 years after a woman has given birth  (and sometimes longer). This same practice is carried out all over the world and it just makes me wonder, maybe this is why they have more solid families. Children are never left alone. An adult is always at home tending to the needs of the child. It is only in America where women are so concerned about getting back to work and then we turn around leave our children with complete strangers all day. I’m not criticizing women who must work in order to provide for their children but some of us do CHOOSE to work and sacrifice this one and only opportunity to be with our babies at such a critical time. This does not go without saying that a lot of hired help or even families/friends cannot be trusted in our homes around our children AND husbands. Maybe this is why so many mothers feel they would rather do everything themselves (me, included).  
 
 I don’t have the luxury, financially, to hire someone to come in once a week to do major cleaning nor do I have the privilege of family or friends who would voluntarily help me, but I certainly don’t object to anyone who makes this choice anymore.
 
Happy Homemaking!
 
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