Moms of Modesty

God seeking and modest women who answer the call to be homemakers.

Be Careful Who You Allow Around Your Children

Children Must Be Protected No Matter What

Child sex abuse seems to be on the rise and not going away anytime soon. With child sex trafficking, pornography, pedifiles, and the list goes on and on, it makes one wonder what in the world is happening? Well, I am not surprised…..disturbed, but not surprised. This sick and twisted behavior has been going on for a very long time behind closed doors but with technology and 24 hour media, we are getting a reality check and to some a wake up call.

When I was growing up my mother never let me spend the night with friend’s or even relatives for that matter. I didn’t understand her reasoning at the time and was very upset and critical of her rules and judgements. Looking back, I would say that I had a very strong, protective, and loving mother. My mother didn’t trust ANYONE. She didn’t care if it was a close relative a close friend of the family and don’t even mention a complete stranger…she knew something that I didn’t then and in the wake of all these child sex abuse scandals, I’m comfortable in saying that parents everywhere need to adopt my moms philosophy….TRUST NO ONE!!!

As a child I didn’t know anything about pedifiles or adults (or even older children) who were seeking out and preying on underage relatives, friends of the family and neighbors. To get permission to sleep over at a friend’s house I would give my mom every excuse in the book. I would say that my other friends get to spend the night at other people’s houses or  you just don’t want me to have any fun or my friend’s parents’ are going to be home all night. In my mother’s head she was thinking that’s exactly who I’m trying to protect you from. I remember on many occasions telling my mother that you just don’t trust me and every time she would respond, it’s not that I don’t trust you, I don’t trust other people. See, she knew the little, BIG secrets that were dared to be spoken of in some families.

Not only was sleep overs off-limits but my mother limited her own life in order protect my sister and I. As a young and beautiful  single mother raising two girls she  could have had any man she wanted. Instead, she waited until her children were grown and out of the house before she got married. She did not want to bring strange men around her daughters because she didn’t trust men who were not our biological fathers to be in the company of her daughters. How many stories have I heard about a mother dating a man and he ends up abusing the son or daughter? TOO MANY. My mother was smart and strong enough to put her wants aside in order to guard our chastity. My mother also had enough respect for herself and her children to not date and have men coming in and out of our home. My mother’s wise decision to never leave my sister and I in the care of any man for fear of them taking indecent liberties with her daughters (and of course other lesser things) has taught me how to be a better mother to my own children.

Some mothers that are looking for Mr. Right and looking for love and affection are finding out that all the while Mr. Right is looking at their son or daughter. These men prey on single mothers in order to get close to the children so they can sexually abuse them and what’s even worse is that sometimes the mother will deny the abuse and allow it to happen in order to hang on to her man. If your children can’t trust and rely on you to do right by them then who are they able to turn to?

As a married woman with a wonderful husband, I don’t have to worry about my children and their father but I do worry about teachers, coaches, their friend’s parents, neighbors,  pastors, mentors, relatives, and strangers. This is not to say I actually have reason to believe that any of these people have done harm to my children but my philosophy is that anyone and everyone are potential suspects. The truth is you don’t really know who people are today. Did anyone know who Jerry Sanduski was? Isn’t it the same theme sometimes with these people? They are good with children, they love being around them, they are nice and caring, and many of them are professionals or outstanding people we look up to in the community.

Ever since my children could talk, I have been teaching them that no one should touch you inappropriately or ask you to take your clothes off. Even as their own mother, I give them privacy in the bathroom, privacy getting dressed (when they are old enough to dress themselves),etc., and I tell them to demand this everywhere they go. There is no excuse for an adult (who ise not the parent) to sleep with a child in the same bed. There is no excuse for an adult to be naked and horseplaying around with children (not even parents). It is sad that I even have to present these conversations to my children and make them aware of such filth because they don’t understand what is really happening in our society. All they hear is don’t, don’t, don’t and they ask why, why, why. Children just can’t be children anymore. Because of child predators, the internet, pornography, sexual and provocative music, television, clothes, and people I have to be vigilant and guard the thing I love most. If this means having conversations with them at tender ages that I am not really comfortable having or I think they are not prepared for, then It’s a fear I have to embrace in order to protect my child’s life and virtue.

  • Pedophiles are notoriously friendly, nice, kind, engaging and likeable.
  • Pedophiles target their victims, often insinuating themselves into that child’s life through their family, school, house of worship, sports, and hobbies.
  • Pedophiles are professional con artists and are experts at getting children and families to trust them.
  • Pedophiles will smile at you, look you right in the eye and make you believe they are trustworthy.
  • WOMEN are on the rise as pedifiles too. ANYONE AND EVERYONE IS SUSPECT.

Watch everyone in your child’s life!

Leave a comment »